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trash mod ([personal profile] trash_mod) wrote in [community profile] biotrash2014-03-19 04:11 pm


Stars, hide your fires;
Let not light see my black and deep desires

- bioshock trash crew proverb




Spoilery comments to this post will be deleted, and their authors vanished in the night to volunteer in our city's fine Protector Program.

Thank you for your attention. Have a nice day!

Welcome to the Bioshock kink meme.

You can find a semi-frequently-updated list of prompts, with links and an indication of whether they've been filled, here at the index.

it is a kink meme. people anonymously (or not) request fic and pictures; other people anonymously (or not) write that fic and draw those pictures. everyone masturbates, peace is achieved.

there are two ways to take part!

1) start a new comment thread with a pairing/ship, and a kink. there's a kink masterlist here if you find yourself strapped for ideas.

2) swoop into an existing comment thread, and fill the person's request with art or writing. if someone's already filled the request, go for it anyway -- the more the merrier! if you need somewhere to upload/host images, try imgur.

there are some beautiful gems on the old kink memes. if you want an example of how this whole thing works, or you're digging for gold, look no further: on Livejournal, on Dreamwidth.


BioSchlong 1/???

(Anonymous) 2014-04-06 08:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Jack was just a farmboy from a small town. A small town which incidentally made a great pit stop on the way to some meeting place for a lot of friendly people with a relaxed view on life and love. He never travelled with them - after all, he had to watch the house while his parents were seeing the world. But talking to them opened his eyes to a lot of things. Above all, that there was enough suffering in the world, and there had to be ways to resolve conflicts that didn't involve violence.

Well, that was one of the things he adopted into his personal beliefs, but it was the most relevant, now:

He got a letter from his parents, where they were visiting his cousin in England, and they asked him to come up. He wasn't usually comfortable travelling, but he knew he had to know. Next thing he knew, he washed up on the steps of a lighthouse, and found himself plunged into a place that had once been beautiful, but had been torn apart by violence and war and greed (no surprise, with what he knew about those things). He was still trembling from watching that poor guy - Johnny - get torn apart. From the fear that the same would happen to him, and from the rattle of the security bot Atlas had sent to protect him. The woman was chased off, but despite what she had done - Jack hoped she wasn't dead, either. She wasn't well, even if she did rip a man to pieces.

And now, he was trembling because he had nearly taken a flaming couch to the face. He sat out of sight, curled around the radio, focusing on his breathing and Atlas' calming voice.

"Now I know you're scared, boyo," Atlas said, gently, "But down here, you're going to have to do a lot of things you wouldn't be proud of in the light."

Jack swallowed, knuckles white around the wrench. The man up ahead was yelling, screaming, and by the sound of it, swinging something heavier than what he had.

"I- I don't want to fight, Atlas," Jack said, nearly a whisper or a whimper.

"Lad, you're going to have to, if you want out alive. It's you or them - what's it going to be?"

He'd rather it was neither. Jack jumped at a loud, piercing clang of metal on cement, as the splicer went into another rant about the state of things in Rapture, how screwed he was (and wasn't).

"C-can't I just talk to him? I'm just passing through, why would he want to--?" Jack shuddered, just thinking it.

Atlas laughed, mirthless.

"Not a lot of folks here are even capable of reason, let alone listening to it."

Atlas started to continue, saying something about survival and necessity, but Jack pinged something in the splicer's words:

"Dress nice! Smile, be yourself - I did it all! Never worked! No one even wants to talk! God, I'm so sick of this! I'm sick of being blueballed, my fucked up hand won't even--"

Jack got an idea.

"Atlas, I think I have an idea," Jack said.

"If it's anything other than clocking him one on the head, it ain't gonna work," Atlas replied.

"No, no, I've got it. I'll handle this the same way I handled the guys trying to book me for tax fraud," Jack said quickly.

Before Atlas could quite puzzle that out, Jack stepped into view of the splicer and shouted:

"Hey! I'll blow you if you forget I'm here!"

Atlas just about choked on his cigarette.

The splicer scoffed.

"Yeah right! You think you're funny? You got some of your friends nearby, waitin' to laugh--"

Jack stuck his wrench in his belt and raised his hands.

"No joke! I've got places to be, I'd like to get there in one piece, and you're obviously, um," Jack tried to find a polite word, as he lowered himself to his knees, "a tougher guy than I am. So maybe we can cut a deal?"

The splicer squinted at him. He was pretty sure, anyway, it was hard to tell when he could only see one eye and that was shaded by something lumpy to begin with. Then, his lip curled, as started to stomp forward.

"Right, yeah, sure. Some guy just comes out of nowhere offering to wet my dick. Like anyone in this town would even touch this!"

He stopped, in front of Jack, and unzipped his pants, and uh woah. Looks like whatever happened to this guy's face happened to him all over. Jack realized he was staring, and his face felt kind of slack, which put him in a spot place with an emotionally unstable and very self-conscious man. The splicer scowled again, and spread his arms.

"Yeah, that's what I thought! You and every other stuck up s--"

But Jack was a man of his word, and interrupted the splicer by taking his, uh, dick into his mouth, to the hilt. The texture and shape were something new, but hey, Jack knew he could figure something out. The splicer dropped his pipe and made a weak noise as his knees buckled, but he caught himself on Jack's shoulders.

"Holy shit -- holy shit!" he gasped, which Jack took to mean his idea was working.

He took care to keep his pace slow - if it'd really been that long for this guy, there was a risk of this going too quick. And while Jack was a man of his word, he was also the kind to honour the spirit of it over the technicalities. He was going to blow this guy's mind so hard, he wouldn't even remember his name!

Atlas listened to the whole thing with wide eyes and a horrified expression.

But goddammit, it worked.


(Anonymous) 2014-04-06 08:56 pm (UTC)(link)
"What the hell was that?" Atlas said in reasonably strained voice when it was all over.

"I know," Jack said, still a little breathless, "I've been paying my taxes for years, but-"

Atlas got a hold of himself and tried not to grit his teeth too hard.

"You know what, nevermind. Forget I asked, just - just get to Neptune's Bounty, would you kindly?"

Re: (addendum)

(Anonymous) 2014-04-06 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)


Re: (addendum)

(Anonymous) 2014-04-07 12:46 am (UTC)(link)
this might just be the best thing i've ever read

holy shit

Re: (addendum)

(Anonymous) 2014-04-07 03:31 am (UTC)(link)
OP Here, and wow! This is PERFECT, this is so great~! :3 And its 1/??? ?? OwO Yay~!
Thank you so much this is so great I'mg gonna add it to my daily re-read list~!

BioSchlong 2/?? alternately i guess i could also call this 'make love not war'

(Anonymous) 2014-04-09 06:19 am (UTC)(link)
(and i could have titled that first part 'Welcome to Fapture', oh well. Anyway on to the next part, Medical Pavilion: The Doctor is In-and-Out)


"Now Steinman certainly ain't gonna be as loving and merciful as everyone else you've encountered," Atlas advised.

Jack was... Seeing evidence of that all over. Blood splashed everywhere, mutilated diagrams, abandoned corpses and unsettling audio diaries. It made his stomach turn, it made his hand clench tighter around the wrench and radio, and it made him more sure than ever that he did not want to end up down a similar path.

Even if it would put down whoever did... all of this.

Jack swallowed, as he observed another mosaic of a face, Steinman's new idea of perfection.

"There ought to be some weapons laying around. Even if there ain't, that telekinesis plasmid ought to be good for something more than demolition..."

Again, Atlas was trying to prepare him for violence. Jack listened, and thought about how he could use his newest ability to do harm.

But he'd seen how fast it threw things - it could easily snap someone's neck, and even if it was quick, just imagining it made him shudder.

There had to be another way. If he could talk to Steinman and convince him to let him through the emergency access -- but going by everything here, Steinman was - to be blunt, literally insane. Atlas had been right - this was someone who wasn't even capable of listening to anyone.

He hit play on the latest of Steinman's diary, and realized as it played that no - Steinman could listen, but just to one thing in particular.

He took down the defaced (and refaced) memorial picture, and started to work.


So there was Steinman. Screaming, ranting, stabbing the hell out of someone who might have still been alive until, well. He stabbed the hell out of them. Lights flicked on, conveniently, and lit up... even more dead bodies, suspended somehow on - lights or tables or something hanging from the ceiling, Jack didn't want to look too hard. He felt sick enough as it was.

Jack swallowed down his nausea and fear, made sure his tie wasn't straight, and then stepped forward.

"What's this, Goddess? An intruder?! He's---" Steinman started to say, snarling, but then he froze, and even from the balcony, Jack could see how wide his eyes were.

With reason - Jack looked pretty ridiculous. Wearing a mask made from the memorial picture, in an uneven suitjacket done up asymmetrically, mismatched gloves and shoes (since he wasn't dedicated enough to this idea to actually break the pairs of things he had), topped with a hat raked a little far to one side. He felt a little like a clown, and the longer Steinman stared at him the more he felt like this was an absolutely moronic idea and that he'd better get used to the idea of hanging from the ceiling like those other bodies.

But then, something shifted in Steinman - almost like he was melting, from how he went from aprehension to dazed wonder.

"Oh, Aphrodite... He's beautiful..."

Jack sighed, relieved. Well, so far so good.

"So beautiful... Could you be -- no, you can't be Aphrodite, you must be Apollo."

"Sure," Jack said. The important part was that Steinman liked him, and was willing to talk instead of riddling him with bullets or scalpels.

"Doctor Steinman, I understand you have the key to the emergency access," he started.

"Have you come to guide me too, Apollo?"

Having two different conversations right off the bat, that was a good sign. No, Jack, focus. He nodded.

"Yes, in exchange for that key--"

But Steinman had already rushed over to the doors of the operating theatre, unlocking them and pulling them open.

"Come in! Please! Tell me how I can improve these --" Steinman stopped to glare over his shoulder at the bodies in his theatre, addressing them with a voice dripping with disgust and disappointment:


Jack couldn't come up with anything to say, so he just nodded and walked through the doors, trailing behind Steinman as he briskly walked back to the table and started gesturing angrily at the bodies, 'this one too tall, this one too fat' et cetera. Jack heard enough the first time, and was only partially listening this time around, nodding a little to make it looked like he was paying attention. To be honest, that was all the had the stomach for. He kept his ears open for a way to interject, to propose some kind of deal

"Please give me your divine inspiration! I could never speak poorly of Aphrodite, but she's maddeningly hard-to-get." His eye twitched when he said that.

Jack just nodded slowly, hoping that would come of sagely instead of completely fucking lost. Or completely fucking lost until Steinman undid the top button of his coat and gave Jack was was unsubtly a flirty look.

... All right, sure. Jack rearranged his plan: Look really good to Steinman, check. Avoid getting murdered by Steinman immediately, check. Talk to Steinman, assess sanity, check. Negotiating...

"All right - If I inspire you, doctor," Jack said slowly, as much to sound professional as it was an optimistic attempt to get Steinman to understand the words he was using, "would you give me the access key?"

Steinman's eyes lit up like Aphrodite herself just dropped in and asked Steinman to carve her up like his other patients. Which, hell, he'd probably actually fantasized about.

"Yes! Share your beauty with me, Apollo!" Steinman exclaimed as he grabbed the lapels of Jack's coat.

Jack was in the middle of reconsidering his ‘Steinman could listen to certain things’ observation when the man smashed their faces together in what Jack was going to assume was a kiss. With two paper masks in the way, it was hard to say. Jack thought he was playing it pretty cool, though, until Steinman pulled them onto the table. The one with the freshly dead body.

Jack's eyebrows made a break for his hairline, something his mask thankfully hid, considering the consequences all the pointy medical tools and dead bodies around them promised.

"Ah," he said breathily, trying to interject with something anyway. Maybe a suggestion, maybe trying to negotiate down to mutual handjobs and then never being within fifty feet of each other ever again, but Steinman threw his coat open and started undoing his pants, shouting some more about filling him with inspiration.

Jack weighed his options. He weighted them a lot, for as long as he could, until he decided he was just going to have to wing it.

He started to undo his own pants, pausing when he realized there wasn't much in the way of lubricant, and that he didn't want to see what Steinman would be 'inspired' to use instead. Thankfully, he could spot a jar of something useable on a far-off shelf, so this wasn't the most worthless hospital in the world. He used telekinesis to make it fly to his hand, which must have looked like magic to Steinman in his current state. Steinman was pleased with his magic trick though, eagerly and gleefully snatching the lubricant out of Jack's hands and getting right to work, uh. Uhhhhh. Uhhhhhhhh...

Jack was staring for other reasons now, lips pursed as he watched Steinman eagerly and gleefully started working himself with his fingers, and quickly too. Maybe it had been rude of Jack to assume he hadn't seen much action post-insanity. But wait, shit, right, he had a part to play, and it was time to play it.

And play it he did, and good god he deserved an award for it. He tried to keep his eyes on Steinman, but they kept trailing to the dead body Jack was just about fucking him on, even though she - it - the body was the last thing he wanted to look at.

Actually it was more challenging to not look at a dead body in here than any room had a right to be, but Jack managed it. Jack managed it, and kept it up at the same time, which was a truly herculean effort to make. He deserved a trophy of some kind at least.

If not for his slick moves in Steinman, then for his slick moves in Steinman's coat pockets, where he found and slipped the access key out in between thrusts.

Steinman came screaming Aphrodite's name, and Jack came by shutting his eyes and thinking really hard about anything but hospitals or dead bodies.

And then while Steinman recovered, Jack slipped himself out, back into his pants, and through the nearest door as fast as he could, shuddering. He needed a fucking shower.

"Atlas, are you still there?"

"Unfortunately," Atlas answered wearily.

Jack felt his ears heating up.

"Tell me you at least got the access key out of that?"

"I did," Jack reported, "I'm heading to Neptune's Bounty now."

"Great. Try to keep your pants on while you do, if you can."

That time, Jack just didn't say anything.

Re: BioSchlong 2/?? alternately i guess i could also call this 'make love not war'

(Anonymous) 2014-04-10 12:10 am (UTC)(link)
i am dYING
I came home planning to be productive and then
This wonderful
ught2ahwge; ihhlas efihlf
Jack is brilliant and you are brilliant~!

Re: BioSchlong 2/?? alternately i guess i could also call this 'make love not war'

(Anonymous) 2014-04-10 12:13 am (UTC)(link)
also your fucking chapter titles are killing me. owo~~<3

Re: BioSchlong 2/?? alternately i guess i could also call this 'make love not war'

(Anonymous) 2014-04-10 02:36 am (UTC)(link)
A lot of unfortunate splicers are going to get a more literal "happy ending" thanks to Jack's "inspiration," aren't they...

(Anonymous) 2014-04-11 11:21 pm (UTC)(link)
nah steinman's just going to start practicing on dudes to recreate that 'Apollo' look

Re: BioSchlong 2/?? alternately i guess i could also call this 'make love not war'

(Anonymous) 2015-06-29 06:04 am (UTC)(link)
This is the best goddamn thing I've ever read.
thepaintedscorpiondoll: Kaizers Orchestra - Magic Trick (Default)

Re: BioSchlong 1/???

[personal profile] thepaintedscorpiondoll 2015-01-17 06:43 am (UTC)(link)
*cackles* Oh my god, yes. Bless you, kind person, for writing this. Atlas's face of horror is the greatest thing I've imagined all night.